Tuesday, December 30, 2008

C'est Villanie! Where is my Archi (Арчи)?





Ru.tv has ruined my life! AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGGHH. I was on the site yesterday, catching up with my Russian pop music and I went to the VJ section to see what my baby love Archi was recommending and stuff...and he wasn't on the VJ list anymore! Quelle shock! For those of you who don't know, ru.tv is a music video channel in Russia and Archi was quite possibly the most handsome man on tv. Half looks, half mannerisms. And he's gone! How could they do this to me? I mean, I was just about to get the courage to call into his show while he was on and talk to him, but no. I bet Putin had something to do with this. They were like "Hey, while Alan's away, let's remove Archi so that the next time he comes back to Russia he will be devastated." Well I am, Putin, I am.

Saturday, December 27, 2008

A Man I Would Sleep With




Okay, I've been watching some sort of "What Not To Wear" marathon with some friends. Between fighting over who would be Stacy and who would be the make-up girl (both of which are fabulous and I totally am Stacy b/c I'm a bitch that hates my life, too...) I realized that I would sleep with Clinton Kelly. He's not quite at the "I would bottom for..." category like Jakie-poo, but he's getting there.
I'm actually starting to turn it into a fantasy. Clinton comes over, makes fun of my clothes, tells me to stip, and then we fuck like crazy in the 360 mirror room (everytime they say "360" I think of the silver fox AC [no, not me, Anderson Cooper, same initials {not a coincidence}] so that's a double turn on plus.)
The big bonus of sleeping with Clinton (besides screaming that name) is after you're done, you get like $5000 worth of clothes, a new haircut, and make-up. Fuck mints on your pillow, I want that type of treatment.

Check out his website (www.clintonkelly.com) for more amazingness, his books, and his life story (a must read.)

Friday, December 26, 2008

My Domestic Wishes for the New Year

Seeing as I've technically received nothing for Christmas yet, except for Phillip and a feud or two, I thought I would write down all my thoughts about my future homestead and what I want to start doing now. There's about a million or so things in my life that I want to do, but a recurring dream of mine is to be uber domestic. As some of you know, I already am overly domestic, especially when Phillip, Sasha Fierce, and I get together. The Christmas party that my roommate and his friend decided to throw at our place and tell Phillip and I about an hour before it started, and the fact that Phillip and I had hors d'oeuvres in that amount of time on holiday appropriate plates can attest to that.

Anyjew, here's what I want in my future domicile territory.

-Herb garden: I'm already starting an indoor one with the help of my mother and clippings from her garden. Her food always tastes ten times more amazing than anything else and she always chalks it up to her fresh herbs. At last count, I think she had 6 different types of Basil growing, along with oregano, sage, rosemary, thyme, and so on. Herbs aren't only good for cooking, they're great for aromatherapy and letting them dry around the house brings new scents into the house.

-Bee hive: Yes, a bee hive. I actually use to know a family that had one in their yard, and you would have never known it. Even when you're near flowers, you don't notice a unusual amount of bees flying around. And, they actually aren't aggressive at all until late summer when they become territorial. That's because bees have a five mile radius for flying and do other tasks within the hive, and also they lose their lives when they sting you. So, if they don't see you as a threat, they leave you bee (pun intended). The benefit of a bee hive of course is the honey, which after having fresh honey from the neighbors, I can tell you is truly amazing. A secondary bonus is growing bee friendly plants in the yard that the bees will pollinate for free.

-A great kitchen: All you really need in life to cook is a pan, a pot, and a great knife; however, there are a ton of things that you can get that will make cooking fun and easy. Like a Kitchen Aid stand mixer, food processor, blender, two ovens, built in cutting board, walk-in pantry, farm-house sink, bread maker, etc etc...Oh, and lots of windows for light. In my dream house, my kitchen will be probably twice the size of the living room.

A large house: Yes, this is everyone's dream, but since I'm not going to have kids (probably not, unless Georgienne can convince me otherwise) you may be wondering why the hell I want a large house. Barring me moving to the old country, I actually want to live with my friends. Pepaw already has a reserved spot even now at my apartment. Some people might think this is weird, but think how much more fun you have when you cook and clean and garden and party with your friends and your spouse. And then, when you get sick of them, just stay on your floor or wing of the house. The communal living has a ton of benefits like cooking for a large group, and doing activities together like working out and shopping, but also has the benefits of living in a house. Plus, I totally get to have a library, workout room, and sun room without feeling guilty about having more rooms than God.

Well, a gay man can dream.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Finals Are Over!

Sorry, children. I have not had the time to write about my existence. Even God took a few days to give Moses the Ten Commandments. Anyjew, the semester is over, but I'm still working. I have my thesis and my other project and now Dr. A wants to give me a third that would involve fusing and subcloning B cells from mice spleens. Awesome.

I have an interview in about an hour for another scholarship. Wish me luck.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

see. it only gets better. i'm missing this and that sucks. and i will forever miss this. that's ok. between these photos and the movie The Rules of Attraction, my brain is officially fried before my Peace Corps interview in the morning. awesome.

this is why my life is livable. more later <3